So....a lot of people wonder why all of a sudden at 36 I decide to put on full braces and go through a surgery of this caliber. I must mask things well ;)
In a nutshell...my teeth do not touch.
Funny picture....but it shows the severity. So...there you go.
SO....when I was 1st put into braces at the age of 13, they told my parents that if not fixed I would have digestive issues down the road. Losing jobs, denied surgeries, etc. and I get to about age 33....ish....and boy were they right!!! It's unexplainable.
I'm pretty sure that I can safely say that you (you reading this) have absolutely NO IDEA what pain I go through daily. I don't say this to be self righteous but to explain...it's crazy. A day in the life of 'Jayme's stomach' is insane. It used to be that it was a bad day or 2 a week, then it was 3 or 4 bad days a week. Now, for about 6 months, I have had maybe a weeks worth of good days, That's a lot of bad days :(
Bad tummy days started out easy enough....it appeared as just a yucky tummy....a bad start to the day. Now, as months have passed, I cannot even pinpoint what is making it a bad day. Yep, the tummy is still monstrously crazy but there's more. I have a strong underlying pain daily. Some days I can pinpoint the source, others, I have no idea what's hurting but I'M hurting. Where I'm at today....crazy reflux, immense pressure in my neck that radiates down shoulders, back and chest and blood pressure issues (which I feel are related to being in pain all the time). On a REALLY bad day, it'll spike all day long. It makes for a really crazy crappy long day.
Now, some of you just read this and went.....nu uh - I know Jayme, I see Jayme....this isn't the Jayme I know. Yep. You're right. When you see me, I'm having a manageable day and easy to cover. When you don't see me or don't hear from me....I'm in bed just trying to make it to the next day. I'm noticing, and you probably are to, that this happening more and more.
I cannot WAIT for September 10th....I'm having a full physical by an internist and then as scared as I am and as anxious as all get out, I really cannot wait for October 21st. PLEASE LORD...I cry out to you...please let this surgery help.
I am having a hard time looking at this 36 year old Jayme and feeling the way I do. It scares me to think if I keep going this way, how long in all reality I can last :(
So again, where do I go with this? The Apostle Paul had a "thorn in his side". No one knows what that thorn was but we do know that he asked the Lord to take it away (and it wasn't) and we know it tested his faith and made it stronger.
I have yet to understand this journey, but I'm on it. So what am I to do with it? I hope....I HOPE....I'm walking it well. I know I have my bad days and those days bear a burden on my family...but I hope the days I don't complain but push through show my kids strength. I hope when they hear my complaints or even see my tears, they also see my prayers or shouts out to the Lord. I hope when someone sees my smile but knows the depth of my story sees the Lord and all good things and strength is coming from Him.
Today was just a bad day. I said that this blog would be good and bad until surgery....this was a bad :(
In a nutshell...my teeth do not touch.
SO....when I was 1st put into braces at the age of 13, they told my parents that if not fixed I would have digestive issues down the road. Losing jobs, denied surgeries, etc. and I get to about age 33....ish....and boy were they right!!! It's unexplainable.
I'm pretty sure that I can safely say that you (you reading this) have absolutely NO IDEA what pain I go through daily. I don't say this to be self righteous but to explain...it's crazy. A day in the life of 'Jayme's stomach' is insane. It used to be that it was a bad day or 2 a week, then it was 3 or 4 bad days a week. Now, for about 6 months, I have had maybe a weeks worth of good days, That's a lot of bad days :(
Bad tummy days started out easy enough....it appeared as just a yucky tummy....a bad start to the day. Now, as months have passed, I cannot even pinpoint what is making it a bad day. Yep, the tummy is still monstrously crazy but there's more. I have a strong underlying pain daily. Some days I can pinpoint the source, others, I have no idea what's hurting but I'M hurting. Where I'm at today....crazy reflux, immense pressure in my neck that radiates down shoulders, back and chest and blood pressure issues (which I feel are related to being in pain all the time). On a REALLY bad day, it'll spike all day long. It makes for a really crazy crappy long day.
Now, some of you just read this and went.....nu uh - I know Jayme, I see Jayme....this isn't the Jayme I know. Yep. You're right. When you see me, I'm having a manageable day and easy to cover. When you don't see me or don't hear from me....I'm in bed just trying to make it to the next day. I'm noticing, and you probably are to, that this happening more and more.
I cannot WAIT for September 10th....I'm having a full physical by an internist and then as scared as I am and as anxious as all get out, I really cannot wait for October 21st. PLEASE LORD...I cry out to you...please let this surgery help.
I am having a hard time looking at this 36 year old Jayme and feeling the way I do. It scares me to think if I keep going this way, how long in all reality I can last :(
So again, where do I go with this? The Apostle Paul had a "thorn in his side". No one knows what that thorn was but we do know that he asked the Lord to take it away (and it wasn't) and we know it tested his faith and made it stronger.
I have yet to understand this journey, but I'm on it. So what am I to do with it? I hope....I HOPE....I'm walking it well. I know I have my bad days and those days bear a burden on my family...but I hope the days I don't complain but push through show my kids strength. I hope when they hear my complaints or even see my tears, they also see my prayers or shouts out to the Lord. I hope when someone sees my smile but knows the depth of my story sees the Lord and all good things and strength is coming from Him.
Today was just a bad day. I said that this blog would be good and bad until surgery....this was a bad :(
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